If there is one thing that kills relationship fast, it is losing connection with your partner.
Many relationships start up great and in-between something happens and before you know it, they are heading for a breakup, if they are not able to remedy the situation fast.
Genuine connection in relationship cannot be overemphasized. It cannot also be faked at least for so long, and it takes a strong level of commitment to maintain.
So if you know you really love your partner and want to keep up the bonds of your connection strong, here are 7 things that helps couples stay connected for a very long time.
If you find yourself already losing connection with your partner, try some of these practical steps here and it could turn your relationship around for the better, if the love is there.
#1. They pray together
A spiritual connection between lovers is one of the strongest connections you can find anywhere. Many couples have testified that even during disagreements, because they have a strong prayer bond, their hearts are softened towards each other and they are better able to communicate their differences afterward.
To create a prayer bond, it’s best to make it part of your routine. If you cannot do it together everyday, at least let it happen once a week. Both of you should agree on a date and time and determine that no matter how angry you are at each other, prayer time must be honored.
#2. Have physical relations regularly
After prayer, love making is a strong bond. It is so powerful that it can even keep together partners who are wrong for each other committed just because the s*x is good or because it has been mistaken as love.
S*x is not love, but love involves love making. Physical relations between partners who are right for each other is amazing. Do not deny each other access to your bodies if you seek to create a deeper bond with each other. If for any reason you dread love making, have an open discussion with your partner on your fears and the things they can do to make you feel comfortable.
Lovemaking requires giving and taking, and it becomes great when both partner are aware of what the other likes and dislikes. Hugs, kisses, holding hands often is also great.
#3 Share your feelings/listen to their feelings
Nothing strains a relationship and keeps couples apart faster than not be able to tell the other what’s going on with you. Your fears, uncertainty, anxieties, success stories, secrets, goals, future plans share them all with your partner. There should be no secrets between you two.
Even that information you consider inconsequential, share it with them. The person who looked at you in a way, you did not like, your boss who pisses you off… etc., share that with them.
Do not think anything is too much or too little to be shared and your connection will grow.
On the other hand, allow your partner to share with you, do not try to cut them off or berate them when they are saying things you might not necessarily agree with. Allow them express themselves completely, make it a safe for them to open up to you.
If you keep berating them for things they have shared, or holding it against them, before long they will stop sharing and you do not want that. Be more empathetic, even if you do not completely understand. Ask them deeper questions like, why do think you feel so strongly about this?
If your partner stops sharing with you, chances are they will begin sharing with another. That’s how life is, we were created to share. We are social beings. Listening is a skill and it can be learnt.
#4 Plan and go on activities together
Plan dates where you can both enjoy each others company without distractions. This entails you be intentional about places you want to go to for dates.
It does not always have to be a restaurant. It can be an art exhibition, hiking, etc. If you are running out of out, here are 10 dates ideas that do not involve sitting at a restaurant. Food does win anyways 9 times out of 10. The point is, be open to exploring and trying new things together.
Nothing kills a relationship faster than boring routines and not having time for each other.
#5 Resolve conflict fast
If you have areas of disagreements, try as much as possible not to let them simmer for so long. It might require one or both of you, swallowing your pride, but love should definitely be greater than any form of pride and ego. Try not to stay angry for too long.
Realize that your partner is human, just like you, and is capable of making mistakes.
If your partner has annoyed you, let them know. Avoiding confrontation to ‘keep peace’ will not help your connection in the long run, it will only build up continuous resentment. You might start acting out and being very passive aggressive, which your partner might see but not know the cause of.
#6 Sleep on the same bed
Sleeping on the same bed together allows you bond more often. Cuddling is great, don’t allow anyone tell you otherwise and sleeping in the same bed allows for great cuddles. Just knowing that you have someone beside you, gives a sense of comfort and safety.
Creating deeper connection between you with your partner will involve vulnerability, selflessness, consistency and being intentional. Supporting, sharing and whole lot of quality time.
#7 Always be there for each other
Always be there for your partner when they are going through difficult times or when they have something to celebrate. Have compassion for each other. Be a strong support system, and don’t be always unavailable when they need you. Support them in things that bring them joy.
This way, you will be creating a deeper emotional connection with your partner.